Ugh

Why do I feel left behind? She hasn't exactly gone anywhere. I'm upset over so many different things. I'm sad because I never wanted to realize how shallow the world is, especially how shallow girls are. I always defended the females, saying they weren't as shallow as men, because they understand more about body image. But I guess I was wrong. I don't like being wrong. HA. It is flattering to know that I can be sexually attractive. But at the same time its demeaning, what am I, a piece of meat? I'll admit it is a little bit of a confidence booster, however when one plan after another is canceled or girls just stop talking to me, it makes me feel like crap. Then when girls flock to her and all want to meet up with her, how am I supposed to feel? I know I shouldn't compare myself, but I do. Its in the girl nature. I'm scared that they will fall for her, I know she won't fall for them, but still... Well, I'm just ranting. I'll be over it soon.